What Lie is Hiding in the Basement of Your Life?

Growing in our faith and overcoming sinful habits and reactions doesn’t usually happen through trying harder. Trust me, I’ve tried.

Just like when you find mold in the bathroom or a light switch keeps not working, there is sometimes a deeper cause. You can clean the mold or replace the light switch, but the problem might keep returning because you haven’t dealt with whatever the root of the issue is. Finding the root cause sometimes involves going into the basement.

The same goes for the things we struggle with. Anxiety keeps surfacing, we repeatedly become defensive when corrected, or we continually overschedule ourselves just to feel like we’re worthwhile and have value.

It’s time to take a look in the basement.

Basements can be scary places! Dirty, cluttered, smelling of mildew… That’s where the old awards from high school are, along with the fraternity tee shirt and the bins of pictures that never made it into a photo album.

It can feel overwhelming just to find what you’re looking for. It would be easier to just say “forget it” and try to deal with the surface of the problem and hope it goes away.

Here’s the thing: it won’t go away.

Growth and healing comes from dealing with our stuff. If the Holy Spirit is nudging you to deal with the issue, then you’ll be much better off if you follow His lead.

Once you make your way into the basement of your life, what do you do there? What does this look like?

In the first step of BUILD, you have become aware of an area of your life that needs your attention. A default reaction to a situation, an ugly emotion, whatever it is that the Holy Spirit has brought to mind as you have spent time in reflection.

The second step is to uncover the lie.

Take out a journal and write about the frustration.

1. What happens? Describe it. What’s the surrounding situation? Is the problem in something you say? Something you feel? What is it that needs to change? What leads up to it? Does it tend to happen when you’re tired? Hungry? Stressed from being too busy?

Example: I become defensive when my spouse expresses frustration over _____.

2. When does it happen? Ask yourself questions about it. Do you only get defensive about certain things? At certain times? Or every time he expresses frustration? Is it only when you’re tired or stressed?

3. Why does it happen? Why do you get defensive? (In our example.) What are you thinking about when that happens? Does it make you feel inferior when you are criticized? Do you feel guilty for causing whatever the frustration is? Is there a lie you’re believing that is underneath the problem? In our defensiveness example, do you believe that it diminishes you as a person if you admit to and take responsibility for your mistakes? What are you believing about yourself, God, or others that contributes to your defensiveness?

Once you get to the root of the issue and uncover the lie that is fueling what you're struggling with, then you can work on replacing that lie with truth from God's Word.

For an overview of the entire BUILD method, click here.

You can also watch my video on it here.