Why Can’t I Focus???
I have one week before our school year starts. As a homeschooler, that means one week until I have much less freedom in my schedule to write, run errands when I want to and spend time with friends. Instead of enjoying the last bit of freedom, I feel frustrated, restless and unable to focus on anything, especially writing.
I sit down to write and instead of getting to work, I find every excuse I can to do something else, except there isn’t much else. The activities that I normally find joy and mental stimulation in have been canceled or altered beyond recognition.
So I check my email and Facebook.
Constantly.
What am I hoping to find there? There’s no life in my stupid phone. No joy. Certainly no peace. It’s an empty well, yet I keep returning to try and drink.
I’m pretty sure I’m not alone. The topics that myself and fellow writers of faith are offering don’t seem to be getting the traction that they should be. We’re offering great opportunities to grow and learn meaningful things and serve one another, but most people don’t seem interested. We all NEED to use this time of canceled activities to go deeper with God, to dig in to what’s really important, to reach out to those around us…
Yet we don’t.
I’ve seen the same thing in my kids. My 9 year old was sitting on the couch yesterday in front of the TV with a movie playing and had his tablet on his lap.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Watching a movie and playing Minecraft.”
“At the same time????”
“Yup!”
“Um, no. One screen at a time! Either watch the movie or play Minecraft - not both!”
If I’m being fair, though, I tend to do the same thing. Two things at once without really focusing on either.
I feel like my brain is unhinged, shooting off in every direction, forgetting things all the time and so incredibly easily distracted that it’s hard to settle into anything. It leaves me feeling bored because it seems like there’s nothing productive to do. There is, but it takes much more effort to make my brain settle into doing it.
I think the underlying stress of the Covid uncertainty and the political and racial unrest puts us in constant “high alert” where we’re more focused on our own survival than anything else. It’s hard to be creative when we’re not settled into a predictable, safe routine.
I read an excellent article recently that addressed this very thing: https://www.bakadesuyo.com/2020/08/lazy-way-to-an-awesome-life/
(After reading that article, “doomscrolling” is my new favorite word.)
The article suggests finding activities that bring us joy and then doing them, even if we don’t “feel” like it at the moment. Do what you know is healthy - spiritually, mentally and physically - even if you don’t want to. Our feelings will catch up if we do the right things.
Some things I’ve been trying to do in order to combat all this lack of focus and contentment (albeit very imperfectly and in no particular order):
Limit time on Facebook and email. I’ve had to stop myself from picking up my phone every time I have the urge. I’ve considered limiting myself to checking email and Facebook only at certain times of day.
Get outside. Nature tends to relax me and settle my brain down. Take a walk, work in the garden, sit on the deck.
Color (or other creative activity). I have a Psalms coloring book for adults. Looking at and creating things that are colorful and pretty is relaxing. Trying to stay in the lines forces my brain to focus. I can also say the verses I’m coloring over and over to ingrain them in my brain and heart.
Use a timer. When writing especially, I find it helpful to set a timer, even for just 20 minutes at a time. I have to stay sitting in my chair typing for that amount of time. It helps me not to allow myself so many distractions.
Check in regularly with God. John Eldredge has created an app (seems counterproductive since it’s a phone thing, but it’s actually helpful) called “Pause”. https://www.pauseapp.com/ It’s a reminder to take a few minutes at different points of the day and just pause. Take a deep breath, listen for God’s voice, give your day to Him. Even if I don’t use the app, it’s good to pause, take a deep breath and talk to the Lord throughout the day.
Journal your feelings. When I feel frustrated and restless, I've started journaling right then what's going on in my head. The act of getting it on paper helps me understand it more, regroup and redirect my focus to something healthy.
Have you been feeling the same way? What have you found that helps you stay focused and healthy?